Farting My Way Toward Hope

On July 1, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn Uncategorized1 Comment

I was having a conversation with someone after worship last night. This friend is a longtime worker for peace and justice in this country. We were celebrating the passage of marriage equality in New York state and simultaneously mourning our governor’s immediate turnaround to lift the ban on hydrofracking.

I’m enough of a Calvinist that I believe there will always be something wrong with this world. We’ll never get it totally right. There will always be one more reason to march on the capitol, call your senator, write an editorial, or practice civil disobedience. That’s what “total depravity” means to me.

On the other hand, I also believe that victory is inevitable for the cause of goodness and right.

Why do I believe this?

Not because I “have faith in people”. I don’t. Trying to make a left-hand turn without a stoplight onto Black River Boulevard during rush hour will destroy that for anyone.
Not because I trust the spineless Democrats or the heartless Republicans. I don’t.
Not because I “believe in America”. I don’t. It’s a country like any other. There are some wonderful things about it and some horrible things. If you want to know what happens when people uncritically “believe in their country”, just look at the Third Reich.

I believe the final victory of goodness and right is inevitable because I believe in God. With my Christian coreligionists (among others), I accept the biblical tenet that “God is love” (that’s 1 John 4:16, in case anybody wants to look it up). This means that love is the “Ground of all Being”, to borrow a phrase from Paul Tillich. Love sits at the center of the universe. Love is the source of the Big Bang and all subsequent nebulae, quasars, galaxies, and planets. The “invisible hand” of the cosmic economy is love (apologies to Adam Smith).

If this is true, then all that is not love is destined to dissipate into nothingness. This goes for all ego-centricity, injustice, exploitation, prejudice, and death-dealing. The Jewish prophet Isaiah sang his Dylanesque folk song: “They will not hurt or destroy on all my holy mountain; for the whole earth will be full of the knowledge of Yahweh (lit. “The One Who Is”) as the waters cover the sea.”

I shared this idea with my friend, who continues to struggle with this faith. She lamented the fact that, for the moment, evil seems so present and powerful. How do we know it won’t win or last forever? In a flash of T.M.I. insight, I thought of a helpful (if gross) analogy:

Have you ever been in a closed room when somebody ripped a really really smelly fart? It’s over-powering. You can’t even think straight. You feel like you’re going to die. But what happens when you crack a window or step outside? The smell goes away. In the context of the larger scheme of things, the fart has less substance and less reality than the world around it. So it is with the evil we see in this world. If love exists at the center of the universe, then all that is not love is destined to disperse into nothingness once somebody opens a window.

We can even get biblical with this. Here’s a line from Psalm 68. When I read this, I interpret “enemies” and “wicked” to mean “evil itself” rather than individual human beings. As it says in the New Testament, the struggle of faith is not against “enemies of blood and flesh” but against “spiritual forces of evil”. Disclaimer aside, read on:

“O God, arise, and let your enemies be scattered; let those who hate you flee before you. Let them vanish like smoke when the wind drives it away; as wax melts at the fire, so let the wicked perish at the presence of God. But let the righteous be glad and rejoice before God; let them also be merry and joyful.”

How You Say It

On June 28, 2011June 28, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

Greetings all!

This has been an amazing few months in my life. In May, the Presbyterian Church (USA) amended their constitution to allow for the ordination of LGBT deacons, elders, and pastors. Then, last week, New York became the sixth US state to legalize same-sex marriage. My wife and I participated in demonstrations both inside and outside our state capitol building.

I also had the opportunity to speak on the local news about the upcoming vote in the senate.

Here is the link to that conversation.

On the Sunday after the vote passed, the same news station surprised us by showing up with cameras in hand at our morning worship service.

Click here to watch the video of the segment they did on our church.

The responses have been myriad and diverse. Here are some words I would use to describe the responses:

Thankful

Condescending

Cruel

Honest

Self-righteous

Pedantic

Supportive

Confused

Curious

Reaching out

Loving

Combative

Arrogant

Hard-hearted

Compassionate

Hateful

Ignorant

Look carefully at this list. It would be a mistake to assume that all the “positive” adjectives refer to those who agree with me and all the “negative” adjectives apply to those who think differently. As a matter of fact, the list is mixed for a reason. I could use several of these words to describe people on both sides of “this issue” (although I am loathe to call it that).

What speaks the most about us in times like these is how we respond, and not just the content of our response. I have felt such compassionate support from those who passionately disagree with me. I have also cringed at the hard-hearted self-righteousness of those who hold views similar to my own.

I will continue to hold onto the views I express in these articles because I believe them to be good and true. I honestly believe that I am following (however imperfectly) the lead of the Holy Spirit and the message of the Bible as I take the course I have chosen. I know that not all of you will agree with me. I won’t ask you to change your mind unless you want to. I will not enter into a Bible-quoting argument with you unless you truly want to understand how someone can read the Bible differently than you do.

I encourage you all, wherever you stand, to look at the character of your response to others. Is it in keeping with the Spirit of Christ? In your words and deeds, are you loving your neighbor as yourself?

What you say does not say so much as how you say it.

A Wild Communion

On May 30, 2011May 30, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn Uncategorized1 Comment

During the week after Easter Sunday, I had the opportunity to gather wild ramps with my friend Nancy in the forest around her farm. For those who are unfamiliar, ramps are kind of like little wild onions. It was a clear and mild day during an unusually rainy spring. Before heading out into the woods, we took a trip over to the greenhouse, where some seedlings needed watering. Her greenhouse is a homemade structure with a cathedral ceiling covered in clear plastic.

As Nancy walked up and down the aisles with her water-hose, I thought back to the Easter Vigil service I had attended at an Episcopal church the Saturday night prior. My friend Ed, the priest, had dedicated the church’s new Paschal candle, led us in the renewal of our baptismal vows, and sprinkled us with holy water in the same way that Nancy was now blessing the baby plants, nurturing fragile new life with the most basic elements of water and light.

After Nancy finished her botanical asperges with the seedlings, we made our way through some of the muddiest terrain imaginable toward the hillside where wild ramps were to be found. As we sloshed through the quagmire, Nancy and I talked about how she came to fall in love with organic farming. The details of that story are hers to share, but the process of telling the story as we walked reminds me of the many biblical readings from the Torah and the prophets that take place in the middle of the Episcopal Easter Vigil service. The readings chronicle the long and messy journey of the Jewish people from slavery and exile into freedom.

Finally, we arrived at the wooded hillside that was covered in patches of wild ramps. These precious little vegetables are currently in high demand among upscale restaurants all over the country. Some farmers earn a significant portion of their annual income with a single load in their pickup trucks. And there we were, sitting in the abundance of a remote hillside in rural New York with a small fortune growing around our feet.

Is this not the essence of Easter? The triumph of abundance and life over scarcity and death! It’s no mistake that Christians celebrate this, our highest holiday, during the springtime. The smell of dirt emerging from beneath the melting snow and the sight of flowers bursting forth from their buds are sacramental reminders of the resurrection life that pervades this universe in which we live. This most precious treasure is the free gift of God for all who will open their hearts and embrace it as such.

Nancy the farmer, priest of God’s green earth, made this truth real to me in a new way as she tore off a piece of edible ramp-leaf and handed it to me on that hillside saying, “Here. This is Communion.” As I put it in my mouth, I couldn’t stop myself from saying “Amen” with my whole heart.

To see a world in a grain of sand,

And a heaven in a wild flower,

Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,

And eternity in an hour.

-William Blake, Auguries of Innocence

History Made Today

On May 10, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

Apologies to anyone who is uninterested in church politics, but…

Today marks an historic occasion for the Presbyterian Church (USA). Twin Cities Presbytery voted to ratify an amendment to the Book of Order that would allow lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered (LGBT) people to serve openly as deacons, elders, and pastors. This amendment was passed by the General Assembly, but needed ratification by a majority (87) of the denomination’s 173 presbyteries.

Today, Twin Cities Presbytery cast the 87^th vote in favor of ratification.

The Presbyterian Church (USA) now joins the United Church of Christ, the Episcopal Church, and the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America as mainline Protestant churches in the US that allow ordination equality for LGBT Christians.

This is a really big deal for us in the PC(USA). As we move forward in this new stage of ministry, there is still work to be done and prayers to be prayed. Of particular concern to me are:

1. The ongoing cause for marriage equality in church and society. LGBT people are still not allowed to get married in our denomination (and most of our states). Many of us would like to see that changed.

2. There are many thoughtful and faithful Christians in our denomination who will feel quite threatened by today’s development. Their concern is that our denomination is departing from biblical and historic Christian practice. While I personally disagree with their interpretation of the Bible on the issue of LGBT equality, I respect their faithful witness to the gospel and feel glad to count them as colleagues and members of my own family. My hope and prayer is that Christians on both sides of this debate might engage in fruitful and transformative dialogue with one another. Hopefully, we can continue to undertake this journey together in the PC(USA). If not, I pray that provisions can be made for individuals and churches to part ways amicably, in hopes of future reconciliation. To this end, I would call on denominational officials to let these churches depart with a blessing and not let issues of interpretation and conscience degenerate into petty spats over church property. The so-called “evangelical” and “progressive” voices need each other if we are to become a church that truly reflects the image and likeness of God.

Tina Fey: Prayer for a Daughter

On April 21, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn Uncategorized1 Comment

OK, this has absolutely nothing to do with ministry on the street or marginal theology, but it has to do with Tina Fey and spirituality, so it is therefore blog-worthy. I’m the father of a daughter, so I can relate to much of this. This passage is originally from Tina’s new book, Bossypants, but I nabbed it from Babble.com:

Prayer for a Daughter

Tina Fey

First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her
When crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels.

What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, That she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back.

“My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.

Amen.

Beyond Bunnies: Anne Lamott on Easter

On April 19, 2011April 19, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

Hey all,

I heard this on NPR yesterday and thought it was blog-worthy. If you haven’t experienced Anne Lamott before, I highly recommend all of her books, especially Traveling Mercies: Some Thoughts on Faith.

If you have five minutes, I recommend listening to the interview, rather than reading it.

Click here to read and/or listen on NPR’s website.

Click the image below to see Traveling Mercies on Amazon.com:

Psalms of Lament from Guantanamo Bay

On February 22, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn Uncategorized1 Comment

Earlier today, I was introduced to a little book of poetry called Poems from Guantanamo: The Detainees Speak, edited by Mark Falkoff. I was immediately struck by the similarity between these poems and the psalms of lament that one finds in the Bible. I will offer an example of each and let them speak for themselves.

First, I invite you to reflect on these words from Psalm 10:

Why, O Lord, do you stand far off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?

In arrogance the wicked persecute the poor— let them be caught in the schemes they have devised.

For the wicked boast of the desires of their heart, those greedy for gain curse and renounce the Lord.

In the pride of their countenance the wicked say, “God will not seek it out”; all their thoughts are, “There is no God.”

Their ways prosper at all times; your judgments are on high, out of their sight; as for their foes, they scoff at them.

They think in their heart, “We shall not be moved; throughout all generations we shall not meet adversity.”

Their mouths are filled with cursing and deceit and oppression; under their tongues are mischief and iniquity.

They sit in ambush in the villages; in hiding places they murder the innocent. Their eyes stealthily watch for the helpless;

they lurk in secret like a lion in its covert; they lurk that they may seize the poor; they seize the poor and drag them off in their net.

They stoop, they crouch, and the helpless fall by their might.

They think in their heart, “God has forgotten, he has hidden his face, he will never see it.”

Rise up, O Lord; O God, lift up your hand; do not forget the oppressed.

Why do the wicked renounce God, and say in their hearts, “You will not call us to account”?

But you do see! Indeed you note trouble and grief, that you may take it into your hands; the helpless commit themselves to you; you have been the helper of the orphan.

Break the arm of the wicked and evildoers; seek out their wickedness until you find none.

The Lord is king forever and ever; the nations shall perish from his land.

O Lord, you will hear the desire of the meek; you will strengthen their heart, you will incline your ear

to do justice for the orphan and the oppressed, so that those from earth may strike terror no more.

Now, with this psalm fresh in your mind, think about the poem “Humiliated in the Shackles” by Sami Al Haj, who remains imprisoned at Guantanamo Bay:

When I heard pigeons cooing in the trees,

Hot tears covered my face.

When the lark chirped, my thoughts composed

A message for my son.

Mohammad, I am afflicted.

In my despair, I have no one but Allah for comfort.

The oppressors are playing with me,

As they move freely about in the world.

They ask me to spyon my countrymen,

Claiming it would be a good deed.

They offer me money and land,

And freedom to go where I please.

Their temptations seize my attention

Like lightning in the sky.

But their gift is an evil snake,

Carrying hypocrisy in its mouth like venom.

They have monuments to liberty

And freedom of opinion, which is well and good.

But I explained to them that

Architecture is not justice.

America, you ride on the backs of orphans,

And terrorize them daily.

Bush, beware.

The world recognizes an arrogant liar.

To Allah I direct my grievance and my tears,

I am homesick and oppressed.

Mohammad, do not forget me.

Support the cause of your father, a God-fearing man.

I was humiliated in shackles.

How can I now compose verses? How can I now write?

After the shackles and the nights and the suffering and the tears,

How can I write poetry?

My soul is like a roiling sea, stirred by anguish,

Violent with passion.

I am a captive, but the crimes are my captors’.

I am overwhelmed with apprehension.

Lord, unite me with my son, Mohammad.

Lord, grant success to the righteous.

Those of us who are American Christians are used to reading the Bible and casting ourselves in the role of hero and victim. We cannot conceive that psalms of lament might be justly composed against us. Listening to the voice of the oppressed and “the other” can often lead us to look at our Bibles, our country, and our lives through a new set of eyes. May God continue to grow us in the direction of true righteousness and, as always, may God’s kingdom come and God’s will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

My Mind Was Changed

On January 20, 2011January 20, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn Uncategorized4 Comments

Below, I’ve posted a link to an interview with Rev. Dr. Arlo Duba, a seminary professor whose personal journey in relation to equality for LGBT Christians is remarkably similar to my own.

As a Christian who still considers himself to navigate (mostly) within the bounds of the evangelical and catholic faith, what I appreciate most about Duba is his grounding in biblical fidelity.

I hate the fact that polarization in our churches has led so many to the assumption that the relationship between LGBT equality and the Bible is “either/or”. Too many on the extreme left dissect and ultimately dismiss the Scriptures as a unique and central source of revelation and enlightenment. Too many on the extreme right refuse to look at the Scriptures with a new set of eyes. They will not allow the Scriptures themselves to challenge long-standing theological and cultural assumptions.

If this argument is going to bear any fruit in our churches and in our denominations, it has to be a biblical argument. If we allow our theological disagreement to deteriorate into a free-for-all over church property, then I believe we have all (on both sides) betrayed the Gospel of Christ and created a bloody spectacle worthy only of the Jerry Springer Show.

Those closest to me know how strongly I support the dual-cause of marriage and ordination equality for LGBT people in my church. I think the relationship between LGBT equality and the Bible is “both/and”, not “either/or”. I believe a biblical case can be made for our cause and I hope to call on others, especially my fellow pastors and biblical scholars, to join me in building it.

To those who work with me for LGBT equality in church and society: Let’s bring it back to the Bible, for it is there that we will find what we need to take our stand for the freedom of all God’s children.

To those who disagree with me on this issue: Let’s keep reading the Bible together. Let’s read it as much as we can with as many different people as possible (including those who are different from or disagree with us). Let’s let our sisters and brothers challenge our assumptions about the Scriptures. Let’s let the Scriptures challenge our assumptions about our sisters and brothers. We might not agree at the end of the day, but at least we will have sought the will of God together. At least we will have (hopefully) grown in our love for God and our neighbors. And that’s what God truly wants from all of us.

Wherever you stand, take a look at Arlo Duba’s words, posted at the link below. There are seeds here that have the potential to grow into authentic and fruitful theological discourse.

My Mind Was Changed

Martin Luther King in his own words (and Bono’s)

On January 17, 2011January 17, 2011 By J. Barrett LeeIn Uncategorized1 Comment

I tried to think of something insightful for today’s MLK holiday, but it’s no surprise that my words could never come close to Dr. King’s. I’ll shut up now and let him speak for himself: